The Local Crank

Musings & Sardonic Commentary on Politics, Religion, Culture & Native American Issues. Bringing you the finest in radioactive screeds since 2002! "The Local Crank" newspaper column is distributed by Community Newspaper Holdings, Inc.

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Location: Cleburne, Texas, United States

Just a simple Cherokee trial lawyer, Barkman has been forcing his opinions on others in print since, for reasons that passeth understanding, he was an unsuccessful candidate for state representative in 2002. His philosophy: "If people had wanted me to be nice, they should've voted for me."

Saturday, December 01, 2007

A Cautionary Tale?

After an unexpected trouncing at the polls, the Liberal Party of Australia (which is actually the pro-business, pro-Iraq War, repulsively nativist and anti-Aboriginal party) had an implosion of its leadership, emerging with the much more moderate (and thus evidently despised by the hard-liners) Brendan Nelson as party leader. Is there a lesson here for the GOP?

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Saturday, September 15, 2007

Meanwhile, at the United Nations...

...to precious little media coverage, the Declaration on the Rights of Indigenous Peoples passed, but over the opposition of the United States, Canada, New Zealand and Australia. And while the United States and Canada gave the usual vapid, mealy-mouthed, diplomatic excuses, Australia at least had the huevos to be brutally honest about the reasoning underlying the votes of all four nations: opposition to tribal sovereignty and support for continuing cultural genocide.

"There should only be one law for all Australians and we should not enshrine in law practices that are not acceptable in the modern world," said (Australian) Indigenous Affairs Minister Mal Brough.

Tell it like it is, Oz.

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Sunday, February 11, 2007

Obamathon

Okay, first Tucker Carlson (who gets my vote for the whitest man in America) criticizes Obama because his church is "too black" (not to mention "not Christian"), then some other white guys decide he's "not black enough" for the African-American community (to the astonishment of Gwen Ifill, the lone black person in the discussion). And William Kristol (who is also evidently white) says Obama is nothing like Abraham Lincoln and would've supported slavery! Then the blowhard Prime Minister of Australia chimes in with the "Osama lurves Obama" meme (though Obama smacks him down hard). I love how white people are not content to be the guardians of who can be "white" (at one time, they even excluded the Irish and Italians); no, they also have to be the ones to decide who can be sufficiently "non-white." I get this crap all the time when I am asked "How Indian are you?" (to which I always reply "Indian enough"). So Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton were "too black" for whites and Obama is "not black enough" (which I assume means "too white") for blacks. So who exactly would you prefer, yonegv? Don "No Soul" Simmons?

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Tuesday, November 21, 2006

The Company You Keep

The United Nations is close to adopting the long-awaited Declaration on the Rights of Indigenous People. Unfortunately, the proposal is bitterly opposed by a coalition of industrialized countries with horrible records on Indigenous rights; namely, the United States, Canada, Australia, Russia and New Zealand. These nations fear the completely toothless and non-binding resolution's call for "self-determination" might give oppressed and marginalized Indigenous people the ridiculous idea that maybe they should have some control over their own lives.

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Thursday, September 21, 2006

This Land Is Our Land

A federal judge in Western Australia has ruled that the Noongar People, an aboriginal tribe, still hold title to the entire metropolitan area of Perth. Perth is the fourth-largest city in Australia and by far the largest city on the Australian West Coast, making this the equivalent of a US federal judge restoring title to the City of Los Angeles to the Chumash and Tongva.

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