The Local Crank

Musings & Sardonic Commentary on Politics, Religion, Culture & Native American Issues. Bringing you the finest in radioactive screeds since 2002! "The Local Crank" newspaper column is distributed by Community Newspaper Holdings, Inc.

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Location: Cleburne, Texas, United States

Just a simple Cherokee trial lawyer, Barkman has been forcing his opinions on others in print since, for reasons that passeth understanding, he was an unsuccessful candidate for state representative in 2002. His philosophy: "If people had wanted me to be nice, they should've voted for me."

Sunday, February 11, 2007


Okay, first Tucker Carlson (who gets my vote for the whitest man in America) criticizes Obama because his church is "too black" (not to mention "not Christian"), then some other white guys decide he's "not black enough" for the African-American community (to the astonishment of Gwen Ifill, the lone black person in the discussion). And William Kristol (who is also evidently white) says Obama is nothing like Abraham Lincoln and would've supported slavery! Then the blowhard Prime Minister of Australia chimes in with the "Osama lurves Obama" meme (though Obama smacks him down hard). I love how white people are not content to be the guardians of who can be "white" (at one time, they even excluded the Irish and Italians); no, they also have to be the ones to decide who can be sufficiently "non-white." I get this crap all the time when I am asked "How Indian are you?" (to which I always reply "Indian enough"). So Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton were "too black" for whites and Obama is "not black enough" (which I assume means "too white") for blacks. So who exactly would you prefer, yonegv? Don "No Soul" Simmons?

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