Total Bastard Theatre

1. Michigan Republicans are planning to challenge voters who have received notices of foreclosure;
2. As Mayor of Greater Wasilla, Sarah Palin proposed to charge rape victims for the rape kits used to investigate their cases;
3. As part of his effort to get away from nasty partisan attacks, John McCain accuses Obama of favoring sex education for kindergartners;
4. Getcher oil for nothin' and yer chicks fer free, and most repulsively;
5. The GOP's shameless branding of 9/11.

This Just In!

Rest of the nation astonished to learn that Phil Gramm has no morals, no scruples, and no reflection! Film at eleven!
In other news, John McCain is totally a maverick and not a low-rent George W. Bush clone.

You're Just Another Brick in the Wall...

...unless you are rich, named Hunt, and a Bush Pioneer.

Republicans Hate Jesus!

Notorious atheist and pervent Senator Charles Grassley (R-Gomorrah) unleashes the awesome power of the Satannic State to harass innocent, Christ-living multimillionaire Men of Fraud--er, I mean, God. Folks, when the day comes that hucksters and con-artists can't abuse religious faith to swindle the poor out of their life savings without having to pay taxes on the take, well, then, the terrorists have won!

Privitizing War

That rumbling sound you hear is Machiavelli spinning in his grave like a a turbine as the Bush Adminsitration deploys a vast, unaccountable mercenary army in Iraq, a mercenary army with such a foul-smelling reputation even the normally supine Iraqi government wants them gone.

Dispatches from the Front: GOP Civil War

1. Newt Gingrinch is now the voice of reason;
2. Dubya attacks his own party for rampant Know-Nothingism on immigration reform;
3. But he completely misses the irony;
4. Senator Ted Stevens (R-Bridge-to-Nowhere, Alaska): coming soon to a perp-walk near you...

Astonishing Coincidence Theatre!

A young man receives a felony conviction at age 19 in 1972. Twenty-four years later, he is hired by the Texas Youth Commission, despite the conviction, which he freely discloses. Twice he is recommended for a pardon by the Texas Board of Pardons & Paroles, though the Governor fails to act. On May1, 2007, newspaper reports reveal that this man, now 56, had complained to his supervisors about sexual abuse of male juvenile offenders at TYC facilities in West Texas as early as 2003, one or two years before officials are willing to acknowledge they received notice. On May 7, 2007, this man, Anthony Mikulastik, is fired by TYC, with the official reason being his felony conviction from thirty-five years ago. TYC officials insist the firing has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with Mikulastik's whistle-blowing...

This has been another exciting episode of Astonishing Coincidence Theatre!

Son of STILL Unclear on the Concept...

Cong. Ken Calvert's got a lot of 'splainin' to do...

Goyathlay's Revenge

Mary Kim Titla, a San Carlos Apache, is running for Congress against the fabulously corrupt Rick Renzi in AZ-1, the district with the highest percentage of Indians (22%) of any in Congress.

STILL Unclear on the Concept

House GOP replaces corrupt Cong. John Doolittle (R-CA) on the House Appropriations Committee with...corrupt Cong. Ken Calvert (R-CA) and even the Right-Wing Blogosphere can no longer stand the stench of it all.

Meet The New Boss...

...Same As The Old Boss? The Democrats are having a hard time living up to their promises on ethics reform.
And, shockingly enough, Republicans are making hay over the Speaker's assinine decision to put William Jefferson on the HOMELAND SECURITY COMMITTEE! See what happens when you don't listen to me?

Republicans LURVE Terrorist $$

The National Republican Campaign Committee will be holding onto money from one of its major contributors, Abdul Tawala Ibn Ali Alishtari, who has just been arrested on "charges of terrorism financing, material support of terrorism, and international money laundering, as well as additional charges of conspiracy and wire fraud."

Aaaaaaaaand....cue the Right Wing outrage!

What, nothing?

Anyone?

Bueller?

Bueller?

UPDATE: The National Republican Senatorial Committee (of which Al Alishtari was an "Inner Circle Member for Life") is donating the terrorist money to charity (I vote for the Twin Towers Orphan Fund or the Anti-Defamation League, just to savor the irony).

I'm Shocked! Shocked!

Apparently, liquor lobbyists have the Legislature bought and paid for! Who knew?
Certainly, I never suspected it when the Booze Brothers had the state take over liquor regulations from every muncipality, or allowed developers to sue the handful of cities (including Cleburne) that were grandfathered in if they dared to refuse them a license (the only instance I know of where you are allowed to sue the government simply because you don't like their decision).

Shut Up & Eat Your Cement (Or Else)!

Yet another foreign toll-road company (this one with ties to the foreign toll-road company that is building the Trans Texas Catastrophe) is buying up small local newspapers along the path of destruction. I'm sure it's merely a coincidence, right?

A Closer Look, Part 2

More good news; the Army is apparently gearing up to investigate civillian contractors in Iraq. 'Bout time. I haven't talked to a soldier or Marine yet who has been in country and didn't absolutely despise these people. I've always maintained that the widespread use of civillian contractors in the War on Terror was primarily a fig leaf to cover how thinly stretched our uniformed military was and is. Plus, the idea of mercenary armies prowling around war zones has been a bad idea since Machiavelli warned about it.

Republicans Love Pork!

The entire Texas GOP Congressional delegation (save only Mac Thornberry, the white sheep of the family) voted against earmark reform. Keep this in mind the next time you hear GOPhers inveigh against "pork barrel spending." Earmarks: The Other White Meat!

A Tale of Two Speakers

In Washington, Nancy Pelosi took over as the first female Speaker of the House and pushed through her promised ethics reform package. Despite the many hosannas being sung, it isn't perfect and still contains some loopholes. It's a good start from a practical standpoint, though, and from a political standpoint, it helps link "Democrats" and "reform" (and by extension, "Republicans" and "corruption") in the public consciousness. The MSM will be watching the new Congress closely, alert for the slightest hint of hypocrisy. When ethical problems erupt, Democrats must act swiftly and decisively. If William Jefferson is indicted, he needs to be expelled from the House so fast it makes his refrigerator spin. If it had been up to me, he wouldn't even be in the Caucus now.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, Tom Craddick clings desperately to power, learning that it is not always better to be feared than loved. He's not the worst Speaker of the Texas House (my vote would be either Gib Lewis or Gus Mustcher), but he is the best current symbol of the worst in Lone Star politics--vicious, unethical, power-mad. I can easily see him, as one blog poster noted, destroying the Republican Party in trying to save himself. Couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

UPDATE: This is exactly the kind of thing that Congressional Democrats need to be avoiding, not lamely spinning.

Another One Bites the Dust

In the last Congressional election of the year, Ciro Rodriguez has defeated Henry Bonilla (who I was beginning to think was invulnerable) in the TX-23 runoff. This caps off a truly remarkable season for Texas Democrats and almost, but not quite, gets rid of the bad taste in my mouth over William Jefferson. Speaker-designate Pelosi is apparently going to keep him off the Ways & Means Committee, but frankly that's just not good enough. She needs to kick him out of the Democratic Caucus entirely until or unless he is cleared of wrongdoing. Is that a double-standard? Of course it is, but Democrats have got to be, as the saying goes, more Catholic than the Pope on the ethics issue, since that's what got them the majority that Ciro Rodriguez just added to.

That's Just Wonderful...

Democratic Cong. William Jefferson of Louisiana easily won re-election yesterday after 90,000 ballots were found stuffed in his freezer. Said Jefferson, "I am grateful for this opportunity to continue to serve as a propaganda tool for the Republican Party." His opponent, State Rep. Karen Carter, told reporters, "C'mon, man. It's Louisiana for God's sake! What did you expect?"

The GOP War on Common Sense...

...continues apace. The Texas Ethics Commission (a eunuch of an agency, if ever there was one) has confirmed that writing the word "check" without an amount is sufficient disclosure.
Later, the commission opined that writing the words "personality conflict" as a reason for leaving previous employment on a state job application is sufficient disclosure of a bloody workplace rampage with an AK-47.