Republicans Give Up...

...on defeating Chet Edwards, anyway. After dispatching Arlene Wohlgemuth and annihilating the hapless Van Taylor, it's pretty clear that Chet couldn't be dislodged from this seat with dynamite. Hopefully, he will still run his usual strenuous campaign and offer some coattails to local Democrats, maybe even carry Johnson County this time (having fallen less than 10 votes short last go-round). And now that he's about as secure as you can get in Congress, he won't feel the need to cave on issues like Bankruptcy "reform."

H/T the Great and Powerful Kos

This Just In...

The "George W. Bush" Monster that has been terrorizing Washington, DC and scaring off tourists for years was recently revealed by a group of plucky amateur sleuth Congressmen to be none other than...Arlene Wohlgemuth, the amusement park owner!

"And I would've gotten away with it, too," groused the so-called "chief executive" as he was led away in handcuffs by the sheriff. "If it hadn't been for those meddling sick kids!"

A spokesman for Senator Max Baucus, one of the fearless young detectives who cracked the case, said only, "Zoinks!"

The Arly's

Redneck Mother makes a convincing case for Debbie Riddle as this year's recipient of the coveted Arlene Wohlgemuth Memorial Award (the "Arly"), as the legislator who best exemplifies Wohlgemuth's example of extremism, obstructionism and just plain meanness. Dan Patrick (last seen ministering to the fallen at Hooters) and Robert Talton have their work cut out for them.

Hat Tip to Capitol Annex!

UPDATE: Miya Shay, the reporter for Houston's ABC 13 who broke the "Dan Patrick only goes there for the buffalo wings" scoop, was kind enough to provide a link to her original post. If you blog this story, please do her the courtesy of using this link.

Republicans Hate Babies...

...or at the very least they hate trial lawyers more than they love babies. Especially in Mississippi.

UPDATE: Not to be outdone by Mississippi, Texas continues to peel children off CHIPs coverage. A spectre is haunting the Captiol, the spectre of Arlene Wohlgemuth...

Republicans STILL Hate Children

The political ghost of Arlene Wohlgemuth continues to block thousands of needy children from easy access to affordable healthcare due to bureacratic barricades in the CHIP program. And if Perry and Craddick stay in power, you can expect more of the same.

Desperately Seeking Nicholas Vancampen Taylor

In case you were wondering how long it would take Nicholas Vancampen Taylor's flailing, collapsing campaign to pull out the race card, wonder no more. Obviously, young Vancampen can't just come right out and say "Boo! Mexicans are coming to steal the land we stole from the Indians! Boo! Be afraid!" so instead, he uses votes on pointless amendments flung by the ironically pro-secessionist race-baiter Tom Tancredo to make fraudulent attacks on Chet Edwards. Pathetic. At least Arlene Wohlgemuth went down in flames with a little of her dignity intact.

Together Again For the First Time!

A match made in heaven, Arlene Wohlgemuth and James Leininger team up to put the beat-down on those whiny sick children with their constant moaning and crying about "health care" and uppity teachers who are all secular humanists and devil-worshippers anyway.

Thank You, Arlene Wohlgemuth (Wherever You Are)!

From The Jeffersonian, yet more proof that Republicans hate children...

Kitten Biting Republicans On the March!

My Right Honorable Colleague Blognonymous coined this lovely phrase based on my description of Republicans who are so blind in their worship of their leaders (George W. Bush, Arlene Wohlgemuth, whoever) that they would support him or her even if he or she bit the head off a kitten on live national television. Now, apparently, it's slowly spreading through the internets like some sort of snarky virus. VERY slowly...

Mr. Popularity

Fewer than 100 people showed up in Waco to hear Vice President Dick Cheney stump for congressional candidate Van Taylor, much less than the 400 who came in 2004 when he campaigned for Arlene Wohlgemuth. In all fairness, though, back then, people weren't generally afraid that Cheney might shoot them...

Chet Edwards vs. The Environment

An alert reader passed this link along and I have to say I'm very disappointed in our Congressman. Long-time readers know that I have been a Chet Edwards fan for years, going back to his days in the State Senate, and I have frequently defended him against some of our more liberal brethren and sistren who can't seem to understand that their only real choices in this congressional district are Chet (who supports them 85% of the time) or someone like Arlene Wohlgemuth (who opposes them 100% of the time). Having said that, it's still sad to see Chet throw in his lot with such a rabid anti-environment blowhard as Richard Pombo of California in his efforts to castrate the Endangered Species Act. Whether you're an environmentalist or a hunter (or both, like me), call Chet at 866-776-6100 (toll-free in CD17) and tell him he has your support, but he needs to clean up his act on the Environment. Preserving the wilderness for our children IS a family value!

Wohlgemuth-Abramoff Connection?

In this recent story from The Texas Observer, notice that Arlene's name is mentioned in a 2001 email from evangelist/ninja Ralph Reed to uber-lobbyist Jack Abramoff as someone to contact in their efforts to kill HB514, an Indian casino gambling bill opposed by Abramoff's clients, the Louisiana Coushatta Tribe, who didn't want competition from Texas tribes. Someone with more time on their hands than me should check Wohlgemuth's campaign filings and see if she received any Abramoff money...

Arlene Rides Again!

From The Jeffersonian. Just in case you were worried that our beloved former state representative Arlene Wohlgemuth doesn't have enough to do with her time since losing a congressional race to Chet Edwards, we receive word that she is busy raising funds for alleged Democrats like Frank Madla. Now that's bipartisan leadership in action!